The Story of Ditch

...and just before the Jrestalian pulled the trigger on its deadly chrysanthemum-powered deflatulator sidearm, the Ditchwizard's life flashed past his mind's eye.

..his humble birth in the far north of the strange land called Muskegon, Michigan;

his introduction to the Mysteries of How Things Work in the basement exhibit of the History Museum in East Orange, New Jersey;

his continuing studies in the High Art of the Chicken,

and the unending puzzlement of watching the Amazing Sue perform unbelievable feats with her Etch-a-Sketch.

Then he belched mightily and the alien happily capitulated and the World As We Know It was saved!